Chapter 20: “The Price of Goodwill Fingers Reaching for the Sky”
“Ah! Rin-chan‚ look! Someone’s being swept away over there!”
Across the brown‚ muddy torrent‚ breaking through the curtain of rain‚
a small shadow wavered.
Its rounded back‚ its size‚ the aura of fragility—
it was obviously a child. Obviously waiting to be rescued.
(Wowww! My “hero detection sensor” is going full throttle!
The alarm is ringing in my head—drrrrrrr!)
“Wait‚ Nagisa! Stop. The ground’s stability has exceeded its limit.
That shadow is just—”
Though Rin-chan’s voice was calm‚
there was an undertone of urgency in it.
But I couldn’t hear it right now.
(Because that kid looks like they’re about to swallow water and sink any second!?
Rin-chan‚ can you hear me!? This is a 100% “waiting-for-rescue” situation!?)
“It’s okay‚ Rin-chan! I’m good at swimming!
Before my life’s HP drains‚ I’ll go rescue them quickly!”
The backpack on my back swayed.
Inside was the “proof” that Rin-chan and I had walked here together—
a sketchbook.
And I shoved the recorder I was holding in one arm
into the backpack as if praying‚ “Don’t lose me‚ okay?”
(Sorry‚ recorder…! I need both hands right now…!
But I’ll definitely come back‚ so wait there…!)
“I’m coming to help‚ hang in there!”
I stepped onto the edge of the crumbling sidewalk‚
and without a second thought for my own safety‚
I leapt into the muddy torrent.
The cold water slammed against me.
The impact was enough to make me momentarily stop breathing—
(Wow‚ it’s cold…! But… somehow… I’m getting hyped…!?
Is this… “self-sacrificial hyper-excitement”…?
I’m scared‚ but excited… my brain’s malfunctioning…!)
The rain poured relentlessly‚
the world kept sinking‚
and yet inside my head‚ it was unusually noisy.
(Hang in there‚ little shadow!
I will absolutely save you!
Hero Nagisa‚ reporting for duty—!)
At this moment‚ I didn’t yet know
that “goodwill” could invite irretrievable loss.
“Puh! Cold… but I won’t lose!”
The torrent was more violent than I imagined‚
trying to drag my body into a “hell called downstream.”
And my backpack‚ waterlogged‚ was as heavy as a lump of lead.
The recorder inside thumped painfully against my back.
(Wait… recorder…!
Right now‚ you’re less a treasure and more a “weight meant to sink me”!
But I’ll never let go…!)
Still‚ that shadow was right there.
Just a little more‚ a little further—and I could reach it.
(Hang in there‚ little life!
Hero Nagisa‚ currently in underwater combat mode!
*Swimming skill: school-level only*)
I paddled desperately‚ and just as I touched that shadow—
“…Huh?”
Something snapped in my mind.
The thing I touched wasn’t a child’s soft skin.
No warmth‚ no trembling‚ no sign of life.
It was—
just a huge trash bag‚ swollen with mud.
It floated eerily‚ stuffed with old newspapers or something.
“No… just… trash…?”
(Wait a second… I… risked my life… for a trash bag…?
My hero detection sensor is seriously malfunctioning today…!)
I froze in the middle of the torrent.
No‚ I couldn’t just freeze in place.
There was no ground beneath my feet anymore.
Only the sinking city‚
and my own heart‚ sank at the same speed.
“Don’t go! I told you that’s just trash!”
Rin-chan’s voice cut through the rain and torrent.
She was still standing on the crumbling sidewalk.
The place I had jumped from was already at the “collapse boundary.”
(Rin-chan… she can raise her voice like that…
I’m sorry… really sorry…
I messed up again…)
I risked my life to save trash.
That fact sank heavier in my chest than the torrent itself.
“…Ah”
It happened in that instant.
The ground beneath Rin-chan—
the place I had jumped from—
split open with a roar.
The asphalt screamed‚
the city itself tore apart.
(No… no no no…
The place Rin-chan is… is collapsing…
Why… why now…!)
The sound of the torrent and the rain
mixed together‚ becoming the sound of the world breaking apart.
“Goooooo!”
A deafening roar swallowed the rain instantly.
The city screamed and crumbled like building blocks.
The ground‚ the buildings‚ the roads—all were sucked into the underground void.
(Hey… world!?
Today’s collapse is way more extreme than usual…!?
Stop with the “Recommended for today: Large-scale sinkhole” thing…!)
The torrent I had jumped into
began accelerating toward that huge hole.
“Nagisa! Grab my hand!”
Across the way—even if it was just a few meters on rubble—
Rin-chan desperately stretched her arm toward me.
I could see her fingertips trembling white.
(Rin-chan… don’t make that face…
I’ll come back… I’ll come back for sure…
Wait‚ can I…? This current is a complete “death waterslide”…)
“Rin-chan…!”
I reached my hand out desperately.
But the torrent’s force was beyond what a human arm could handle.
The backpack on my back got even heavier as it soaked up water‚
the recorder inside banging against my spine.
(Ouch…! Recorder…!
You’re not a “mental support” right now—you’re “physical attack power”…!
But I’ll never let go…!)
“…Ah‚ the backpack…”
A horrible sound came from behind.
The water pressure and impact from floating debris—
the straps of my backpack—
snapped.
It tore off far too easily.
The next moment‚ the backpack itself
was sucked from my back into the torrent.
“Wait! No‚ not that!”
I instinctively reached for it.
More precisely‚ for what was slipping out of it—
“that book.”
The old sketchbook we had picked up.
The painting of the rainy city that Rin-chan drew.
The precious‚ precious memory that symbolized our promise to “live together.”
But the fingertips that touched it—
didn’t touch the corner of the sketchbook.
They touched the “bottom” of the backpack sinking into the torrent.
(No… no no no…!
The sketchbook… the recorder…!
Don’t take everything… everything away…!)
The backpack made a single dull metallic thud as it hit a rock in the torrent—
then vanished into the darkness of the deep hole.
The sound was the recorder.
The voice of that child I had been hugging all along.
“…Nagisa‚ forget the book! Protect yourself!”
Rin-chan’s scream cut through the rain and collapsing sounds.
Her voice was more desperate than any voice I had ever heard‚
more painful than any scream.
(Rin-chan… don’t make that voice…
I’ll… I’ll grab it properly…!
The sketchbook‚ the recorder… Rin-chan’s hand…!)
But my fingertips—
reached for the corner of the sketchbook disappearing into the torrent
and sliced through the air.
The world sank‚
memories floated away‚
Rin-chan’s hand drifted farther.
(Please… please…
Don’t sink yet…
Don’t take all my precious things away…!)
My fingertips brushed the paper slightly.
But it wasn’t salvation.
The moment my hand touched it‚
the waterlogged‚ fragile sketchbook
crumbled with a rustle.
The city we had gazed at together.
The old couple’s lantern.
The awkward self-portrait drawn on the roof.
The pages with these drawings
were sucked‚ one by one‚ into the muddy water.
(No… no…
Don’t dissolve so easily…
My memories… aren’t paper-armored enough…?
Well‚ they are paper… but… paper…!)
“Ah… ah…”
I couldn’t make a sound.
In front of me‚ our “past”
disappeared into filthy scraps of paper.
Because of me.
Because of my selfish goodwill‚ chasing an imaginary child‚
I ran out of control.
(Why… why do I…
Always chase “someone who isn’t there”…
And hurt “someone who is”?)
“Nagisa‚ your hand! Hurry!”
Rin-chan’s voice grew more distant.
The collapse didn’t stop.
The rubble carrying me was swept
to the side opposite Rin-chan—
toward the dark underground void.
(Rin-chan… you’re stretching out your hand so much…
What am I doing…?
Why am I chasing only scraps of paper…?
But… those were… my everything…)
“Rin-chan‚ I’m sorry… my sketchbook—”
I sank further into the water trying to reach the disappearing pages.
Cold.
Dark.
And—
the torrent pushing my body suddenly grew heavier.
(Huh…?
My body… won’t move…
The water… is heavy…)
My arms and legs wouldn’t obey.
The water I had been paddling desperately moments ago
was now cold and heavy like iron‚
dragging me deeper and deeper.
(No… no…
Rin-chan… you’re still calling…
I can hear you…)
But my strength to resist the torrent
snapped.
Cold and darkness rushed in at once‚
my consciousness slowly turning murky white.
At the edge of my vision‚ Rin-chan desperately stretched out her hand.
But that image—
blurred by rain and tears—was no longer visible.
“…Gisa… Nagisa…!!”
Far away‚ Rin-chan shouted my name.
Hearing her voice stripped of all emotion like that—
this might be the last time.
My body was swallowed by the dark waterway along with the rubble.
There was nothing left in my hands.
The sketchbook.
Rin-chan’s warmth.
My baseless confidence of “it’s okay.”
(Ah… I lost everything…
What am I even doing…?)
The dark water swayed and drifted away.
I just sank.
No strength to resist remained.
“…I wanted to say… don’t let go…”
That whisper reached no one‚
drowned out by the raging torrent.
(Actually… Rin-chan’s hand…
I never wanted to let go…
Why… why did I…?)
The world continued to sink.
And now‚ even the bond between us
was torn apart by the torrent.
Cold and darkness
slowly erased my consciousness.
(Rin-chan… I’m sorry…
Truly… I’m sorry…)
The last thing I saw was Rin-chan‚
desperately reaching out with her hand in the rain.
And then‚ it too‚ dissolved into the darkness.
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