Episode 21.5: "The Crimson Dragon King or the Boring Kitchen" Everything in my field of vision is painted over with thick‚ orange-colored passion. The crater of the active volcano 'Flame's Stomach' is no longer an area where living beings are permitted to exist. The atmosphere exceeds five hundred degrees‚ and with every breath‚ a lethal thirst dominates this hell‚ as if the lung membranes are being scorched. However‚ at the edge of that boiling magma‚ I‚ holding a parasol‚ stood alone while stifling a yawn.
 A perfectly tailored black maid outfit paired with a pure white apron without a single stain. The frilled headdress crowning my head does not budge even when exposed to the erupting scorching gale‚ as if defying the laws of physics. The crimson dragon king who turns everything to ash—for me‚ this hellish heat was nothing more than the discomfort of "a sauna with a broken temperature setting."
「……Fuu. None of them know what 'doneness' means. Undercooked is a sin‚ truly.」
The words spilled with a bored sigh turn into blue sparks upon touching the heat. As the external temperature rises‚ the trapped heat beneath the maid outfit was gently stroking my skin without escape. The chemise made of the finest silk absorbs faint sweat and clings to my thighs‚ and with every step‚ the lace of the garter belt persistently traces my flushed skin.
The harsh hot wind tries to forcibly lift the hem of my skirt‚ but at the same time‚ it brings a sensual sensation as if violently exposing my own body heat confined within the thick fabric. ――Hot‚ yet somehow cold. At the boundary where the world's heat source clashes with my own magical power‚ only the sensation of silk sliding over my skin stimulates my brain with abnormal clarity. Too sweet to call it discomfort‚ an unreasonably indulgent celebration of survival. I have no way of knowing that it is a hopeless contrast to the savior who sold the proof of survival called "pain" at a distant lake.
「The 'heat' of this world is far too lukewarm. It's boring‚ and it seems the underside of my skirt is getting completely damp.」
When I look up at the sky‚ the sunset and the glow of the flames mix‚ pouring down intense lens flare that threatens to burn through my retinas. What is accumulating is not snow. It is the white‚ dry ash of death spewed from the crater. While casually brushing it off with the shoulder of my maid outfit‚ I felt bottomless despair at the fact that there was nowhere an "ultimate ingredient" capable of withstanding my flames.
Even the lava pool below is nothing more than "lukewarm caramel sauce" to me. For the past several hundred years‚ I had not encountered an opponent worth cooking. Everything turns into white charcoal with no time to scream before my fingertips even touch it.
「……Oh? Unusually‚ some 'flies' have appeared.」
Narrowing my amber eyes from the shade of the parasol‚ I saw an out-of-place silver gleam forming a line at the edge of the crater. It was the unpleasant buzzing of insects trying to further ruin my boring afternoon.
With a crunch‚ a jarring sound disturbed the crater's silence. Cutting through the pulsating boil of the lava and kicking off the black rock face‚ a group clad in silver armor appeared. Their number was about fifty. They were the kingdom's proud elite‚ the 'Silver Dragon Subjugation Knights'. Holding their state-of-the-art anti-fire dragon magic shields‚ they moved in coordinated formation to surround me standing at the center.
「This ominous sweet wind filling this land……and that ridiculous outfit! So you are the culprit polluting this collapsing hell with 'playing house'! We‚ the silver swords‚ shall seal the path leading to the master of this volcano‚ the lava dragon (Volcano)!」
The muscular man at the front—the one who seemed to be the knight commander—thrust a magic sword enveloped in absolute zero cold air toward me. I planted my closed parasol like a cane and‚ with my back perfectly straight without a single flaw‚ gave the man a sharp glance with my amber eyes. ……Hmm. The equipment is first-class. But the contents are the problem. It's like overused cheap meat with the grease of overconfidence sticking to it greasily. It seems the prep work alone would take until sunset before any cooking.
「The path to the master‚ you say. Unfortunately‚ this place is currently our exclusive kitchen. For outsiders‚ how about entering through the back door at least?」
I neatly adjusted the wrinkles on my apron and returned a bow with the utmost elegance in perfect maid etiquette.
 「Kitchen‚ you say? What nonsense are you spouting in this hellish crater! You must be that detestable lava dragon's familiar!」
The knight commander raised his voice. Behind him‚ I could see his subordinates whispering in confusion—"Just one woman……?" "But she's not sweating a single drop in this intense heat"—while trembling slightly.
「Familiar‚ you say…… How rude. I am merely in charge of temperature control for this place. ……Though at the moment‚ I'm fed up with nothing but 'undercooked' trash appearing.」
「You call us trash!? Don't fuck with us! Everyone‚ deploy the formation! Capture this woman and make her spit out the lava dragon's location!」
At the commander's order‚ the knights all raised their magic swords at once. Absolute zero cold air raced through the space‚ clashing with the crater's heat and dyeing the field of vision pure white with explosive steam. But as if mocking that uproar‚ the bottom of the crater began an even more intense‚ eerie pulsation.
GUUU‚ OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!
A low‚ heavy roar that shakes the eardrums directly. The sea of magma split in two‚ and from there emerged a colossal body covered in scorching scales—the 'Ancient Lava Dragon (Ancient Volcano)'—crawling out with rage at the invasion of its territory.
 Its eyes regarded both the silver insects (flies) and me in my out-of-place maid appearance as enemies that should be burned equally.
「A-awawa……! It's out! The lava dragon!」 「Don't falter! We have the blessing of anti-fire magic! We'll take down this maid along with it!」
The boiling knights. The roaring giant dragon. At the bottom of hell's cauldron‚ the spice called "uproar" at its highest level began to gather. I narrowed my amber eyes coldly and snorted in displeasure.
「……Flies and a lizard. Both are nothing but barbaric ingredients that don't know how to apply 'heat'. ……And on top of that‚ bringing cold swords. I really hate it when my kitchen is chilled. If I catch a cold by any chance‚ how exactly will you take responsibility?」
As I said that‚ I suddenly turned my gaze toward the distant sky.
「……That aside. While better than those wooden dolls‚ who is it that's been sending this 'tasteless gaze (scan)' tracing my skin with a prickling sensation for a while now? Peeping is quite poor manners for a customer.」
The inorganic and cold presence of observation coming from the lake's direction. While feeling unpleasant at the sensation as if touched by its rude fingertips‚ I first began the leisurely cleanup of the "unsanitary trash" scattered before me.
「All units‚ deploy Icicle Burst! Freeze the entire crater along with the target!」
At the same time as the knight commander's roar echoed‚ dozens of magic swords were raised overhead in unison. The air screamed as the extreme low-temperature magical power forcibly stole the crater's heat. The space that had been boiling just moments ago was instantly covered in silvery crystals‚ and lethal icicles poured down like a heavy rain. At the same time‚ the 'Ancient Lava Dragon' in front opened its massive jaws. The super-high-heat magma breath compressed in its throat was released as a dazzling flash.
Absolute zero ice from above. Fire that melts all things from the front.
 Faced with an inescapable deadly crossfire‚ I simply lowered my eyelashes in a bored manner.
「……Fuu」
What spilled from my lips was not a counterattack. It was a "sigh" full of a maid's disappointment at the unsightly scattered space. In an instant. The space within a few inches around me turned into an invisible absolute severance—the 'Crimson Parlor (Red Parlor)'.
 The pouring icicles were not even allowed to touch me and sublimated into steam instantly by the space's heat. The fierce breath rushing from the front also bent unnaturally like a snake with a will avoiding an obstacle before grazing the edge of my parasol‚ futilely gouging the rock wall behind me. The evaporated ice and the hot wind mixed‚ creating a dense white fog that covered the field of vision.
「W-what……!? You nullified the 'Icicle Burst'……!?」
The knight commander spoke in a voice turned inside out as if he had seen something unbelievable.
「Nullified? Please don't say such misleading things. I simply maintained the proper room temperature so that your 'muddy water' wouldn't dirty the floor. ……Spilling water in front of a maid shows quite poor upbringing as a customer.」
「Muddy water‚ you say……!? This is the supreme ice magic made with the kingdom's utmost wisdom!」
「Wisdom‚ is it. ……Unfortunately‚ such cheap cold air is insufficient for 'air conditioning management' of this crater. It is nothing but unpleasant condensation (noise).」
When I coldly declared that‚ the knight commander blushed with humiliation and gripped his magic sword again.
「You……! You call the 'order of iron and law' that protects the kingdom muddy water!」
「Order‚ is it. ……Unfortunately‚ I cannot allow such mud-stained discipline to cross the threshold of our house. ……Please leave.」
As if interrupting the verbal exchange‚ the lava dragon roared with irritation. Its lizard-like barbaric sense of smell seemed to be recognizing me not as an "enemy" but as an "unknown natural predator" threatening its ecosystem. The giant dragon took a deep breath again and concentrated even denser magical power in its throat than before.
「Oh dear. Still planning to scatter soot? Mr. Lizard. I'd appreciate it if you didn't dirty my uniform any further.」
I rested the parasol on my shoulder and stared at the reddish-black flash approaching head-on. The second breath burned through the crater's air and closed in. But right in front of me‚ it dispersed with a futile "pop" sound like a bursting bubble. The flames do not reach. Even the heat does not reach. Before an absolute heat source‚ this level of playing with fire is nothing more than a physical phenomenon equivalent to "lukewarm water."
「Ice that only wets the floor‚ flames that only scatter soot. ……You all are underestimating the effort of 'cleaning' and the existence called 'maid' far too much‚ aren't you?」
I took a step toward the knights and the giant dragon. At that moment‚ the magical pressure (pressure) of the entire crater followed my will and bore down on their shoulders as physical mass.
「Gu‚ aaaaaah……!? My body won't move……! Th-the armor is heating up……it's starting to melt droopily like candy……!」
「――Crack‚ crackle!!」
Exposed to the sweet heat filling the space like scorched caramel‚ the kingdom's proud absolute-zero armor warped pitifully like sugar and crumbled. The knights' screams overlapped with the lava dragon's creaking strange noises. Within a few meters around us‚ it was no longer a place where the laws of the surface world applied. If I wished it "hot‚" the world burned; if I desired it "cold‚" causality itself froze. The domain of the dragon king who turns everything to ash——. It had now transformed into the ultimate unpleasant 'cleaning target area' where violence named despair dominated most quietly and fiercely.
With a snap‚ there was a single dry sound. The hard sound of closing the parasol delivered a ruthless period to the hellish cries in the crater. The knight commander‚ on his knees and gasping under the magical pressure that bent his armor under its own weight‚ looked up at me with clouded eyes. What leaked from his trembling lips was no longer words‚ but only a moan (wheeze) condensed with primal terror.
「……A‚ ga…… Y-you…… Wh-what……」
「Visiting hours have long passed. Could you please stop dirtying our entrance any further?」
Gracefully pinching the hem of my maid outfit‚ I offered the supreme bow with hell's inferno at my back. At the edge of my vision‚ the lava dragon was desperately flapping its wings‚ writhing pathetically in an attempt to flee. However‚ not even a single spark was permitted to escape from this domain under my control. 「——Now then. Shall we incinerate the unpleasant 'bulky trash' all at once?」
 I mercifully brought the fingertips of my raised right hand together. Snap. A single finger snap. That was the only switch (end) needed to erase their existence from this world.
In an instant. The crater itself transformed into an inescapable giant 'ultra-high-temperature sterilization chamber'. The air expanded all at once with physical weight‚ and invisible heat waves converged from all directions. At the same time‚ the oxygen within the space was literally 'incinerated‚' stripping away their right to breathe from their lungs entirely. The knights' thick magic barriers and the lava dragon's scorching scales were penetrated without a single exception. 「Gi‚ aaaaah……‚ ga……!」
The screams lasted only a fraction of a second. The next instant‚ even the throat membranes were burned by the heat rays‚ and the sounds released from oxygen-deprived vocal cords were swallowed by the violent heat and completely vanished. Dazzling white light filled the retinas‚ painting the world pure white. A few seconds later. The raging hot wind stopped abruptly like a calm. The knights' cries that had been tormenting my ears and the magic beast's roars were no longer audible at all. All that remained was an overwhelming "deathly silence" that even absorbed sound.
Fluttering down from the sky was white powder.
 It was the remains of the kingdom's proud knights who had been there moments ago. And the pitiful remnants of the lizard that had pretended to be the master of the volcano. Without being allowed a single scream‚ their flesh‚ bones‚ and even their will uniformly carbonized and crumbled into 'ash' snow. 「……Ah‚ again this. As expected‚ they amount to nothing but 'ash (dust)'. It only increases the sweeping effort.」
Opening the parasol again‚ I inorganicly crushed the ash that had been the "former knight commander" at my feet with the tip of my heel. With a crunch‚ a dry sound like breaking fragile sugar confectionery echoed futilely. ……Boring. Far too brittle‚ with no resistance. Pest extermination (cleaning) that ends with just a sigh and a finger snap without needing to use full power. Is there no existence in this world capable of facing my flames and this fierce 'cleaning' head-on?
The knights and the lava dragon no longer existed here. All that remained were the overwhelming silence that absorbed sound and the remnants of "what had once been life" filling the crater pure white. I toyed with the handle of the parasol with my fingertips and blew away the ash accumulated on the shoulder of my maid outfit in one breath‚ without hiding my disgust.
「……Haa. I've increased the 'ash (trash)' again. I have no hobby of dealing with (cleaning) inferior goods that burn out in an instant.」
What dwelled in my amber eyes was not the afterglow of annihilation‚ but a deep‚ unfillable void. There‚ a heavy tremor resounded directly into the depths of my mind.
『——Flare. That's enough playing around. Head to the Amber Cider Lake. There's an interesting toy (brat) there. An ultimate aroma is drifting that will distract my hunger.』
「……A toy‚ you say. Perish the thought‚ Lord Zeno.」
I returned a perfect maid's bow with not a single gap toward the void.
「What I need right now is not a toy for killing time‚ but an 'ultimate incineration target' capable of withstanding my merciless trampling. That lake should only have a little girl spreading a sun-scented‚ overly sweet vanilla smell. ……Going there for cleaning would be a waste.」
『Kukuh. Doubting my tongue? On the other side of that sun-scented vanilla‚ a supremely "scorched" truth has begun to mix in. ……Look‚ it's here.』
It was that very instant. The wind stopped‚ and a strange silence visited as if color had drained from the world for a moment. ――Zun. It was not a physical shockwave. It was a heavy 'wave of compensation' released when the world's very laws (reason) screamed and a fundamental deficit occurred. I stopped my fingers gripping the parasol dead still.
「……!? Just now‚ far away……I heard the sound of an ultimate 'soul' scorching.」
 What tickled my nostrils was not the volcano's smoke. From the direction of the distant amber lake came a thick‚ intensely sweet death scent like bitter chocolate boiled down——heavy and terribly sweet.
「A terrifying firepower (compensation) incomparable to that lizard. ……Did it burn the world using its own 'pain' itself as fuel?」
『How about it? A material worth burning‚ isn't it?』
「……Yes. I shall acknowledge it. A scent of 'scorch marks (error)' this hopelessly deep and clinging……I have smelled it for the first time since birth. ……As a maid‚ I have unwittingly let my blood boil.」
The boredom that had been drifting in my eyes until a moment ago was no longer there at all. What dwelled there was the ferocious and joy-filled glow of a destroyer as the crimson dragon king who had found the ultimate "cleaning target." I gracefully flipped the skirt of my maid outfit and gazed at the opposite shore of the golden lake.
「Savior or a pitiful bug. ……It doesn't matter which. I shall perfectly 'incinerate (clean)' the 'soul's scorch marks' clinging to that world with my full-powered flames‚ without leaving a single speck of dust.」
The parasol opened once more‚ and I stepped out with light footsteps toward the "next cleaning area" where the sweet death scent drifted.
【Chapter 21.5 Complete】
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