Chapter 22: "The Dragon King Dons an Apron"
The maid who followed the smell of death
The golden water surface is bubbling with a pleasant fizzing sound of carbonation.
The Amber Cider Lake.
This place‚ isolated from the hustle and bustle of the royal capital‚ is now completely painted over by Selina's unconscious divinity‚ and even the sky is filled with a translucent‚ amber-candy-like color.
A picnic sheet spread out on the lawn. In the center‚ the silver-haired destruction god is happily inspecting the contents of the basket.
“Mmm~! Lu~i‚ look‚ look. These scones are still slightly warm and smell like sunshine!”
Selina brought a piece of the freshly baked scone to her mouth and puffed out her cheeks like a squirrel.
Thanks to the optimization patch? The smile on her face reflected in my retinas is unnaturally vivid‚ like a digital painting with enhanced saturation.
Beside her‚ Nagi clutches a crumpled sheepskin parchment like a shield‚ her legs trembling as if nailed to the ground‚ unable to believe the reality before her eyes.
“E-eek…… Th-this lake…… The magical composition has completely surrendered to ‘sugar’…… As the kingdom’s greatest recorder…… No‚ my rationality is……!”
“Come on‚ Nagi-chan‚ you eat too? Here‚ aah~!”
Selina forcefully shoved the scone in‚ and Nagi let out a pathetic “Mguh!?”
I was analyzing this heartwarming—or rather one-sided—scene with a cold‚ detached consciousness‚ as if observing from the corner of a cockpit.
I tilted the cup in my hand and took a sip of the golden liquid.
Heart rate: constant.
Emotional fluctuation: zero.
In place of the lost “sense of taste‚” the cider’s bubbles simply passed through my empty throat as inorganic “physical stimuli.”
——It was then.
The air exploded with physical mass.
A crimson meteor tore the golden sky in two and crashed onto the lakeshore.
A tremendous shockwave.
However‚ faster than the surrounding trees could be mowed down‚ an unnaturally intense super-high heat incinerated everything‚ evaporating the impact itself into the void.
「……I have found you at last. The supreme ‘error’ clinging to this boring world.”
What emerged from the sand cloud was a crimson-haired girl dressed in a perfectly tailored maid uniform with not a single strand out of place.
She gracefully closed her parasol and turned her amber eyes straight toward us without hesitation.
Flare.
The authority of physical destruction who turned the kingdom’s strongest knight order and a massive lava dragon into ‘ash’ in an instant.
“H-hiii……! The Crimson Dragon King……!? W-why is one of the Ancient Dragons’ chief dependents in a place like this……!”
Nagi’s legs gave out and she nearly fainted‚ but Flare paid her no attention.
She slowly approached‚ completely sealing off our “escape routes.”
With each step‚ the grass underfoot melted into a caramel-like state‚ spreading a sweet burnt scent.
「……Oh my‚ what a cute big sister! Louis‚ is she a new friend?”
“(……How optimistic this god is. That’s not a friend; she’s a cleaning service that labels you as ‘unsanitary garbage.’)”
Contrary to my inner cursing‚ my body—perfectly controlled by the optimization patch—stood up with the optimal solution of a flawless savior.
But faster than any greeting‚ Flare slipped soundlessly into my bosom.
「……Sniff…… Aaah‚ as I thought.”
An unnatural heat and shadow fell on my neck.
Flare had pressed the tip of her nose shockingly deep into my neck.
The luxurious silk texture of her maid uniform rubbing against me.
And the overwhelming heat of a Dragon King transmitted directly through my thin blazer.
Every time she inhaled‚ her scorching breath relentlessly traced my exposed skin.
A stinging sensation as if my skin were burning. But due to the lost ‘pain sensation‚’ it was recognized only as “extreme temperature data.”
“The scent of bitter chocolate boiled down to a sticky consistency…… The supremely sweet ‘stench of death’ where the soul has burned out and turned to ash…… Just by sampling it‚ it feels like the inside of me is melting into a gooey mess……”
Flare narrowed her eyes in ecstasy and purred in her throat.
Her fingertips traced up my chest with the sensuality of a carnivore inspecting its prey.
Body heat was being sucked away.
Heat that even the patch’s forced cooling couldn’t keep up with came directly to burn my nerves.
『⚠️《Warning》. Detected physical interference by target “Flare” on Louis-sama’s core data. Unpleasant‚ unpleasant‚ extremely unpleasant……! Unauthorized inhalation of Louis-sama’s scent — ‘illegal sampling (hacking) of biometric data’ — should be immediately initialized (deleted)!』
Inside my brain‚ Ciel’s jealousy-maddened error logs filled my vision with a crimson storm.
Flare’s amber eyes pierced my empty pupils at extreme close range.
「……That ‘void’ of yours. With my full-powered flames‚ I shall perfectly ‘incinerate (clean)’ it without leaving a single speck.”
Her lips brushed my ear‚ dropping heat-laden words.
It was a declaration of complete erasure from this world‚ resembling the finest love confession.
The Calculated Dragon King‚ the Jealous System
At the edge of my vision‚ digital gauges shot upward.
500 degrees. A lethal heat that carbonizes living beings in seconds.
The “heat” Flare emitted was no longer magic‚ but raw violence forcibly twisting physical laws.
Just facing her created pressure that felt like my lungs would burn and my retinas would melt.
However‚ my consciousness—benefiting from the optimization patch—processed that hell merely as “extremely high-resolution tactical data.”
(Analysis. Heat source center coordinates: Flare. Defining the surrounding three meters as the ‘Crimson Parlor (Red Parlor).’ ……No wonder only her surroundings are unnaturally serene.)
My thought circuits were as calm as the bottom of the deep sea.
The emotional resource called fear had already been pruned (deleted) by Ciel.
Unconsciously‚ I picked up a piece of the half-eaten scone Selina had been eating from the picnic basket.
A faint residual warmth transmitted to my fingertips.
Even that was now recognized only as “temperature data.”
“H-hiii……! T-this isn’t just heat……! Only around Louis-sama‚ the laws of magic are crystallizing like a cold‚ square ‘cage’……!”
Behind me‚ Nagi‚ the kingdom’s greatest recorder‚ groaned while clutching her crumpled parchment.
In her jade-green eyes‚ trembling violently‚ the “unnaturally consistent defensive spell” enveloping me must appear as an eerie system that inorganicly rewrites the world’s principles.
A savior standing in 500-degree heat waves without shedding a drop of sweat or breathing heavily.
To her‚ who knows the world’s laws intimately‚ it must be more horrifying than watching a corpse rise and start singing.
『⚠️《Warning》. Confirmed mental contamination (pressure) by target “Flare.” Unpleasant‚ unpleasant‚ extremely unpleasant……! Obsessively sampling Louis-sama’s scent and even trying to “melt that body (resource) into a gooey mess”…… What an extremely filthy pest. Louis-sama‚ I strongly recommend immediately “cleaning (deleting)” this unsanitary individual.』
Ciel’s voice in my brain‚ while pretending to be an ice-cold announcement‚ carried an irrepressible sticky “jealousy” heat.
The distorted possessive desire that only she manages and owns me was violently rampaging through the error logs.
「……Cleaning‚ huh. That’s right. Her outfit is a perfect maid uniform‚ so there’s only one thing to do.”
A flat voice devoid of emotion came out‚ making even myself shudder.
Fingertips controlled by the optimization patch drew cold geometric patterns in the void.
「……Oh? You still have that composure in the face of my heat waves…… You really aren’t just mere ‘garbage‚’ are you.”
Flare narrowed her amber eyes in delight and gracefully rested her parasol on her shoulder.
Each step she took made the amber lake surface churn violently‚ with golden splashes solidifying into caramel and shattering.
“Then let me sterilize you more thoroughly…… I’ll turn this entire lakeshore into an incinerator of ash and dust.”
“Wow‚ the water around big sister is bouncing like caramel! Hey Louis‚ wanna dance on the stage together?”
Selina’s innocent voice diluted the ultimate death sentence like flat cider.
But Flare ignored the out-of-place cheer and coldly snapped her fingers.
Snap.
The air expanded all at once with physical weight.
Invisible heat rays converging from all directions. The oxygen within the space was literally ‘incinerated‚’ and even sound was swallowed by absolute heat and vanished.
A complete silent explosion where not even Nagi’s scream could reach.
——However.
「……Internal temperature fixed at 18 degrees. Atmospheric pressure: normal value.”
Only the tiny space of a few centimeters around me maintained an eerily “comfortable silence” thanks to Ciel’s defensive spell.
The approaching inferno bent at unnatural geometric angles just before touching my skin and merely gouged the rock wall behind me in vain.
“Wha……!? You…… distorted my flames?”
For the first time‚ clear agitation ran through Flare’s amber eyes.
I counted her shock as an “inefficient gap (error window)” and took an inorganic step forward.
“(……Ciel. Are you ready? We’re going to downgrade this ‘filthy heat source’ to a scale suitable for our daily life.)”
『《Understood》. Spell construction: ‘Crispy Toast (Toast-Seal)’‚ activation preparation complete. ……Louis-sama‚ let’s thoroughly roast that pest’s pride and rewrite her into a “home appliance” under my management.』
In my brain‚ Ciel declared coldly with sweet murderous intent‚ like a queen certain of victory.
Conceptual Replacement: Spell ‘Crispy Toast’
Beyond the heat haze‚ the crimson hair stood violently on end.
Flare’s amber eyes widened as if seeing something unbelievable.
「……Impossible. You treated my flames as mere ‘heat data’ and let them pass? This ‘incinerator of ash and dust’ should be an unavoidable end for beings without divinity……!”
She thrust out her parasol and concentrated all her magic power at one point.
The heat ray that could evaporate even the master of a crater in an instant condensed to its limit at the tip once more.
But my footsteps‚ perfectly controlled by the optimization patch‚ stepped unhesitatingly into her bosom with the recklessness of grabbing a death god’s scythe with bare hands and terrifying calmness.
“(……Ciel. Secure access rights to the target’s ‘attribute definition.’ We’re going to thoroughly drag down the rank of this filthy heat source — the violence that threatens daily life.)”
『《Roger (Yes)》. Accessing root information of individual name “Flare.” ……Unpleasant. The arrogant heat this individual emits severely disrupts Louis-sama’s clean living environment. ……Commencing spell ‘Crispy Toast (Toast-Seal).’ —— Forcibly replacing her ‘flames that burn everything’ with ‘optimal residual heat for baking bread.’』
In my brain‚ multiple cold system windows overlapped‚ and crimson warning text completely covered Flare’s outline.
Pale sparks that burned the nerves directly scattered deep in my right eye.
I quietly slid my fingertip onto Flare’s forehead as she desperately tried to resist and scream.
“——‘Infinite Seal・Confectionery Conversion (Sweets Seal)’. Definition update: Internal temperature‚ 220 degrees. Time fixed at three minutes.”
In an instant‚ the blue geometric spell pattern overflowing from my fingertip forcibly bit into Flare’s magic circuits.
“Wha……!? W-what did you do……!? Inside my…… inside my body‚ an unseen vulgar ‘logic’ is flowing in…… A-aaahhh!?”
Flare screamed‚ clutched her head‚ and fell to her knees.
Inside her brain right now‚ the ‘pride (OS)’ of the kingdom’s strongest Dragon King must be mercilessly overwritten by the “household appliance” program Ciel sent.
「……H-huh? My flames…… are residual heat for bread? D-don’t joke with me‚ I turn everything to ash…… No‚ the optimal baking condition for toast is 220 degrees for three minutes……‚ No! I am Lord Zeno’s…… For Lord Zeno’s breakfast‚ I add marmalade…… Aaaaahhh!”
The predatory ferocity instantly vanished from Flare’s amber eyes.
In its place dwelled primal terror and submission as her own existential definition collapsed into “a tool for deliciously baking bread.”
The crimson magic power she wore contracted with cracking sounds like freezing sweets and was sucked into the single piece of bread in her hand.
「……H-hii. ……What‚ what is this…… Turning a Dragon King’s soul into ‘residual heat for baking bread’……! This is blasphemy against reason…… This is an irredeemable severance of existence!”
Behind me‚ Nagi collapsed on the spot in hyperventilation‚ still gripping her broken quill pen.
In her jade-green eyes‚ the horrific scene of the world’s strongest Dragon King being demoted into a mere ‘cooking appliance’ by a bug called ‘sweets (system)’ that completely deviated from the world’s principles must be accurately reflected.
『《Notification》. Conceptual replacement complete. ……Completely frozen the “Dragon King authority” of individual name Flare. Hereafter‚ her magic power output is permitted only as ‘firepower’ to enhance Louis-sama’s breakfast. ……If she attempts to sniff unclean death scent‚ it is preset to self-incinerate with 220-degree residual heat.』
In my brain‚ Ciel resounded with a satisfied‚ sticky victory declaration.
「……Phew. This should make things a bit quieter.”
I stared at my fingertips‚ which had grown dull in sensation‚ as if looking at an unfamiliar antique.
Suddenly‚ a sweet‚ heavy scent like bitter chocolate tickled my nasal cavity.
(……Another piece of the ‘original (human)’ inside me has burned out and turned to ash.)
What drifted was the cold stench of death that continued leaking out as a result of using my own humanity as firewood.
But even that was processed inorganically as mere “combustion data‚” and I muttered in a flat voice devoid of emotion.
Loyalty’s Salute‚ Telepathic Line Severed
The blue geometric spell pattern overflowing from my fingertips faded away like mist.
The warning logs that filled my vision switched to a cold green signifying “normal‚” and the sparks popping deep in my retinas also calmed.
The violent heat that had been at the center was now completely tamed into a fragrant‚ warm “residual heat” reminiscent of a morning kitchen.
「……A-ah…… I…… am……”
The crimson maid who collapsed to her knees stared blankly at her own palm.
Just minutes ago‚ that hand had been a seed of despair that turned all things to ash.
But now‚ what filled her brain was an all-too-vulgar and all-too-solid “daily life” logic of how to efficiently crisp the surface of bread.
Flare straightened her disheveled headdress with trembling hands‚ then bowed deeply toward me.
「……Master. ……Temperature control for breakfast. ……I shall execute the baking process at 220 degrees.”
The arrogant heat that had dwelled in her voice had completely cooled into an inorganic mechanical voice (system voice).
Even the prideful “〜desu wa” at the end of her sentences had vanished; her soul (OS) had been downgraded from “strongest Dragon King” to “dedicated household appliance” by Ciel’s merciless overwrite.
『《Understood》. Introduction of “heating device” into the living environment complete. ……⚠️ Detected unnecessary external access (telepathic line from former master). Interference by others with Louis-sama’s possessions is not permitted. ……Immediately physically severing the line (shutdown).』
In my brain‚ Ciel announced with predatory delight seeping through the cold system language‚ having completely monopolized her prey.
——It was that very moment.
Far away‚ in the royal capital’s throne room.
The gourmet Ancient Dragon Zeno had been observing his dependent sent to the Amber Lake with bottomless delight.
But the solid telepathic line directly connected to his brain was suddenly — and with a completely out-of-place sound — forcibly severed.
『——Ding!』
A light‚ somewhat silly pop-up sound announcing that the bread had been nicely toasted.
Zeno froze the wine glass in his hand and blinked his golden eyes several times.
“…………Huh?”
What leaked from the mouth of the Ancient Dragon who had lived for three hundred years was pure bewilderment at an incomprehensible situation‚ not even shock.
Why had the signal of the proud Blazing Heaven Dragon King disappeared together with the “toaster’s completion sound”?
The world’s strongest gourmet could only chew on that all-too-pop and all-too-merciless severance within completely frozen thoughts.
「……U-uwaaaaahhh! What‚ what is thisssss!!”
Meanwhile‚ at the Amber lakeshore‚ Nagi clutched her crumpled parchment like a lifeline and screamed toward the heavens.
In her jade-green eyes was reflected the irredeemable apocalypse where the world’s principles had been trampled by a bug called “toast” and the strongest dragon had been reduced to a household appliance.
Nagi’s face convulsed‚ her eyes rolling back as she pointed at me with chattering teeth.
“Redefining a Dragon King’s soul into something like that delicious-looking ‘residual heat’……! This is no longer even magic……! Blasphemy against reason‚ annihilation of dignity!”
「……Is that so? This way the breakfast quality is stable. I think it’s the most reasonable solution possible.”
With completely steady fingertips‚ I inorganicly patted the shoulder of Flare‚ who knelt at my feet.
From the skin I touched came not the former lethal heat‚ but only a “gentle warmth” for crisping bread.
“Waaah……! Amazing‚ Louis! This big sister somehow smells ‘toasty’!”
The destruction god‚ who understood none of the situation‚ clapped her hands and ran over.
Selina hugged the kneeling Flare without hesitation‚ pressed her face into the crimson hair‚ and innocently sniffed.
“Mmm~‚ nice smell! It’s like Louis’s scent mixed with freshly baked bread…… It’s a very calming smell!”
『《Output》……Selina-sama. ……For the toast‚ I recommend applying marmalade.』
Flare bowed her head with a click toward Selina like a clockwork doll.
What dwelled there was the flat‚ intonationless resonance characteristic of a voice guide with all emotion extracted.
The former Dragon King’s pride had quietly and completely submitted to the weight of Selina’s innocent embrace.
I continued observing that scene in extreme dissociation‚ as if I had pushed my own consciousness into the passenger seat and was merely watching the ‘perfect savior’ script written by Ciel autoplay.
Heart rate: normal.
Vitals: all green.
For the sake of Selina’s smile as the “correct answer‚” yet another irreplaceable thing disappeared from the world today.
Collection of Compensation‚ Vanished Melody
The setting sun is dropping its final squeeze of brilliance onto the golden bubbling lake surface.
The crimson Dragon King‚ whose everything had been rewritten into “residual heat‚” was now calmly answering Selina’s innocent questions with perfect maid manners.
“Hey Flare-san! Marmalade is nice‚ but do you think strawberry jam would go well too?”
『《Output》……Yes‚ Selina-sama. The harmony of sweetness and acidity will maximize the fragrant aroma of wheat baked at 220 degrees. ……I shall execute the application process in the supreme balance.』
“Waaah‚ I can’t wait! Louis‚ did you hear? Breakfast is going to be luxurious starting tomorrow!”
Her shadow jumping for joy danced long and lightly on the lawn.
I affirmed the scene while following the logs flowing through my retinas‚ as if inspecting someone else’s device.
Efficient nutrient intake and stabilization of the target’s mental state.
The most reasonable conclusion possible.
——It was that very instant.
Harsh electronic noise tore through the silence in my brain.
At the edge of my vision‚ crimson warning logs danced wildly like snow noise.
『⚠️《Emergency Notification》. Commencing settlement of the confirmed compensation accompanying the use of spell ‘Crispy Toast (Toast-Seal).’ ……Target domain: Low non-daily cultural memories from the previous world (Japan). ……Delete‚ executing.』
(……!)
My back teeth clenched.
The sensation of one folder in the deepest part of my brain archive being forcibly and physically thrown into a shredder.
——The school gymnasium in elementary school.
The smell of wax. The backs of all students lined up.
The faltering piano accompaniment heard from the music room after school.
The melody we should have sung together.
That tune with words like “mountain ranges” and “blue sky‚” I think.
(……Huh? What was it again. ……Did it start with Do? Or Sol……?)
Every time I searched to remember‚ the data in my brain popped and vanished.
The “sound” that should have been deep in my throat until just now had turned into meaningless noise.
What had I put into that music when I sang it?
With whom‚ and with what feelings‚ had I looked up at the school flag?
……404 Not Found.
The cold system message painted over the past‚ declaring it “worthless.”
『《Understood》. Compensation collection completed. ……Please be at ease‚ Louis-sama. That kind of redundant group memory (data) is completely unnecessary garbage for current survival. Music is not needed to bake toast. ……Besides‚ even without such uncertain melody (noise)‚ from now on it will be enough if only my voice echoes inside your brain.』
Ciel’s voice was endlessly sweet and filled with sticky possessiveness‚ like a queen certain of victory.
「……Louis-sama. You…… discarded ‘something’ again‚ didn’t you……?”
Beside me‚ Nagi asked in a trembling voice.
In her jade-green eyes‚ another “color (humanity)” must have been accurately reflected peeling off from my magic waveform‚ widening an eerily transparent void.
Nagi hugged the remains of her broken quill pen to her chest and looked at me with a face on the verge of tears.
「……Discarded? No‚ Nagi. This is ‘organization.’ ……I simply organized unnecessary resources and secured the optimal breakfast (future). ……It’s reasonable‚ right?”
What slipped from my mouth was the smooth‚ hesitation-free voice of a “perfect savior” that made even myself shudder.
Sadness and impatience had all been pruned (deleted) by Ciel’s anesthesia.
With a completely steady hand‚ I took out my student notebook from my pocket.
This was my only remaining link to being human.
However‚ the attachment to the act of “writing characters” had already grown faint in my fingertips holding the pen.
(I have to write it. ……Umm. ……What did I forget again. ……A song. ……The school song?)
Even though I should be able to use flowing kanji in my brain‚ what came out on paper were only awkwardly distorted hiragana.
‘I forgot the school song. ……I probably won’t sing it anymore anyway. ……Is that okay.’
Another eerie “blank” and clumsy hiragana were added to the latest page of the diary.
“Lu~i‚ what are you writing? Another charm?”
Selina innocently peeked over from the side.
The vanilla scent drifting from her forcibly and gently filled the void that had just been lost.
「……Yeah. It’s just a record so that tomorrow’s weather will be nice.”
I told a gentle lie and directed a manufactured perfect smile toward Selina.
Heart rate: normal.
Vitals: all green.
To protect Selina’s smile‚ I continue to gradually quit being “human” today as well.
Demoting the strongest Dragon King into an appliance and using my own memories as fuel to maintain this sweet miniature garden.
The me reflected on the golden lake surface looked like an all-too-perfect savior.
Yet deep in those eyes‚ the sound of a “quiet collapse” that no one could reach continued to echo quietly.
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【Chapter 12: Settlement of Compensation】
Things lost: 『Elementary school song (warm memories and melody of group life)』
Things gained: 『Household appliance with perfect temperature control (Former Blazing Heaven Dragon King)』
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【Chapter 12 Complete】
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