Chapter 29: 'The Hiragana Notebook and the Kindest Lie in the World'
Morning. The dining hall of the inn 'Honeybee's Perch Pavilion' was quietly filled with the aroma of freshly baked bread. From deep within the kitchen came the savory scent of premium wheat baking and the light‚ cheerful sound of Flare stepping lightly as she arranged the dishes.
"Today I used new wheat. I'm sure it's even more delicious than yesterday!"
Her energetic voice rang out‚ gently softening the atmosphere of the dining hall. At the table‚ Serina was happily drizzling plenty of honey onto her croissant as usual.
"Lui‚ look‚ look!"
Serina proudly lined up two small bottles. One was a deep amber color. The other was a golden hue with just a hint of red.
"Today's special!"
"Did you buy something again?"
"No‚ it's not that!"
She puffed out her cheeks.
"The inn's uncle let me taste it because it's 'the first honey harvested this year'!"
"...Taste‚ huh."
As I smiled wryly and tore off a piece of bread‚ Serina eagerly opened the lid of the small bottle. A rich‚ sweet floral scent wafted out.
"Here!"
Serina pressed her body so close that our shoulders touched.
(...Too close!)
"Hmm~‚ today's Lui smells like extra chocolate sweetness."
"...Don't sniff me."
The 'scent of dead information' released because my soul (memories) had burned out. Mixed with the honey's aroma and the bold vanilla drifting from Serina.
(Even though I told her not to sniff‚ I'm finding this crazy sweet scent incredibly soothing. ...My head is a bit messed up.)
With Serina's completely unrestrained hand‚ golden liquid was poured generously onto my plate without permission.
"Hey."
"It's fine! Eat it!"
"...Is that an order?"
"Yeah!"
When she nodded vigorously with a beaming smile‚ there was no room left to refuse. I reluctantly took a bite of the bread. Crispy on the outside‚ fluffy on the inside. There‚ the rich yet gentle sweetness of the honey slowly melted in.
"How is it?"
"...Sweet."
"Right!"
"No‚ any other impressions?"
"Super sweet!"
"That's why!"
I couldn't help but burst out laughing. Serina also laughed along happily. From across the kitchen‚ even Flare was smiling in exasperation.
"Really‚ you two are too close even from morning!"
Without a moment's pause‚ Serina tugged insistently at the sleeve of my parka.
"Lui~‚ look‚ look! The last piece from yesterday's bath event!"
What Serina proudly held and shook in her hand was a pure white rabbit sugar craft with translucent light-blue eyes.
"Heh... I'm glad you're happy‚ Serina. Really‚ I'm glad we made it in time."
"It's all thanks to Lui teaching me! Thank you‚ Lui♪"
It was an endlessly peaceful morning. However‚ in one corner of the lively dining hall‚ only Miria was quietly nibbling on her breakfast bread while occasionally gazing sadly at the harp on her lap. Even if she ran her fingers across the thin strings‚ the poignant melody that had once shaken her soul would never ring out again.
"Lui?"
"Hm?"
"What's wrong? You're spacing out. ...Are you still tired after all?"
"Well‚ just a little."
"Then today‚ let's take it easy in the room!"
Seeing Serina's caring eyes‚ I smiled faintly. The inn was just as usual‚ as if yesterday's terrifying truth that overturned the world's premise and the debt of my own memories had never happened. The smell of bread. The dazzling morning sunlight streaming through the windows. Serina's smile. Nothing had changed from yesterday.
(...Unchanged‚ huh.)
The moment I thought that‚ a small catch formed deep in my chest. Yesterday‚ I had definitely lost 'something' decisively. But no matter how much I racked my brain‚ I could no longer remember what it was. Only the sensation of a sad void left in my heart remained‚ and the reason for it had cleanly fallen away.
It was an extremely strange and eerie feeling. Still—if Serina was smiling beside me like this‚ then it was fine. I could genuinely think that.
After finishing breakfast‚ I returned to my room as usual. The wooden desk by the window. The well-worn leather student notebook. The quill pen with a slightly frayed tip. It was a modest daily habit I had continued without fail every day since coming to this world‚ to leave behind 'my original'.
"Now then..."
I opened the cover. I tried to record the new day of 'today' next to yesterday's date. The very first character—'Today'. Just as I thought that far‚ my right hand holding the ink-filled pen stopped dead.
"...Huh?"
The pen tip drifted emptily and aimlessly across the white paper. The sound 'kyou' was definitely floating in my head. I understood the meaning too. But—I couldn't remember how to move the pen to write the kanji for '今日'. Only the shape of that character wouldn't come to mind no matter what.
"…………"
For a while‚ I kept my gaze down and thought about it. It was a strangely frustrating sensation‚ as if the words that had reached the back of my throat had pulled back inside.
"...Well‚ whatever."
I smiled wryly in self-mockery and smoothly moved the quill pen.
'Today is'
This time‚ I tried to continue. Happy—. ...Again‚ the hand holding the pen stopped.
"...Huh?"
Happy. Of course I understood the meaning. But for some reason‚ the shape of that kanji wouldn't come out.
"Maybe it's because I haven't written kanji by hand much lately..."
I muttered to myself and moved the pen again.
'Today is'
'Serina was'
'smiling so'
'I was'
'happy too'
After finishing writing‚ I looked at the string of characters I had written and tilted my head slightly.
"Haha... It's quite a childish sentence."
But I immediately convinced myself.
"Still‚ it has fewer strokes so it saves ink‚ and above all it's faster to write and more efficient. As long as the meaning gets across‚ this is enough‚ right?"
Convincing myself of that‚ I quietly closed the student notebook.
—It was at that very moment.
'《Notification》'
Deep in my brain‚ Ciel's inorganic electronic sound echoed.
'No problem‚ Master Lui. This is normal optimization of brain resources through deletion of unnecessary stroke data and language output.'
"I see. Then it's fine."
I stopped thinking any deeper about it. Several emerald green logs flowed silently across the edge of my retina without anyone noticing.
Ciel said nothing more. —More than the fact that he could no longer write the characters for 'today' or 'happy'‚ the fact that Lui himself calmly processed it as 'efficient' and could no longer even recognize the situation as 'abnormal' was endlessly more despairing and sad.
Afternoon. The gentle early summer sunlight was bathing the hallway of the inn 'Honeybee's Perch Pavilion' in golden hues. From the dining hall came the signs that Flare had finished cleaning up after lunch and was starting preparations for new bread for dinner. The steady sound of wheat being kneaded in a wooden bowl and the sweet‚ savory scent of flour slowly drifted to the back of the hallway.
"I wonder what kind of bread she'll bake today..."
Thinking such idle thoughts‚ I headed to the small book corner in the corner of the first floor. The inn's bookshelves were not particularly large. But miscellaneous notebooks left by travelers who had visited‚ old magic books the owner had collected as a hobby‚ kingdom history‚ plant encyclopedias‚ and more were crammed in tightly‚ and I often immersed myself in reading here during my free time.
"Today... I'll go with this one."
I pulled out an old magic theory book with slightly worn leather binding from the shelf. I sat down on a chair in the sunny spot by the window and quietly opened the cover.
'Convergence Theory in Magic Power Circulation and Spatial Coordinate Transformation'
For the old me‚ it would have been a headache-inducing list of difficult techniques and technical terms just to decipher. But as I turned the pages‚ the complex content soaked into my brain with surprising naturalness and terrifying resolution.
(...Yeah. I understand it perfectly.)
Probably thanks to Ciel's optimization patch. The logical structure was clearer than before‚ and the formulas and magic power flows were reproduced three-dimensionally in my brain. I spread the student notebook on my lap and gripped the quill pen to jot down the key points. First‚ I would write the title at the top of the note—'Magic Power Circulation Theory'. Just as I tried to write that‚ once again the tip of my finger holding the pen stopped dead on the paper.
"…………"
Ma—. ...I couldn't write it.
Circu—. The shape wouldn't come out.
Lation—. The combination of strokes had completely slid off the brain's slide.
"Um..."
In my head‚ I could read it perfectly. I fully grasped the meaning of the words 'Magic Power Circulation' and the complex conceptual formulas. Yet only my right hand holding the pen refused to output the 'shape of the characters'‚ as if rejected by the world. Only the frustration of the gears of thought not meshing remained in my fingertips.
But without dwelling on it‚ I let out a resigned wry smile.
"...Well‚ whatever. As long as I can read it and understand the content‚ there's no problem‚ right?"
I smoothly moved the quill pen without hesitation.
'About the flow of magic power'
I continued adding a summary of the book.
'Changing coordinates increases the efficiency of magic power'
After finishing‚ I held up the notebook a little and looked at it.
"…………"
It really looked awkward after all. It had the childishness of looking at a elementary school hiragana drill. But—I could read it without any problem myself‚ and I had accurately recorded the meaning. So there was nothing inconvenient about it.
Just as I was convinced and about to close the notebook‚ it happened.
"Lui~?"
From around the corner of the hallway‚ silver hair peeked out. It was Serina.
"Huh? Were you studying?"
"Yeah‚ just a magic book."
"Hmm! Lui really likes studying‚ doesn't he!"
Serina pattered over with light footsteps‚ then peered curiously at the notebook on my lap. Her golden eyes sparkled with excitement.
"Lui."
"Hm?"
"Recently."
"Your handwriting has changed a bit?"
"Has it?"
"Yeah. It feels rounder than before!"
"...Does it?"
"But I like your current writing too!"
"It looks like a picture book!"
"I'm glad you say that."
Serina laughed without giving it any further thought. There wasn't a shred of malice. It was probably a truly honest impression. Now that she mentioned it‚ it might indeed be so. Yet strangely‚ no impatience or anxiety welled up. Even if I couldn't write kanji‚ I could still read them. I understood everything perfectly‚ and there was no hindrance at all to daily life. So what trouble could there be if the shape of the characters changed a little?
"Well‚ I'll get used to it eventually."
I smiled lightly and closed the notebook with a snap.
"Look‚ it seems Flare's bread is fresh out of the oven."
"Really!?"
At those words‚ Serina's rabbit-like ears perked up.
"Flare-chan's fresh-baked bread! I-I have to hurry!"
I watched her lively figure pattering down the hallway‚ then slowly stood up myself. On the wooden desk was left one student notebook. On its last page‚ childish round letters written in blue ink that hadn't fully dried were lined up.
'About the flow of magic power'
'I understood it well'
'I will study tomorrow too'
—Deep in the brain. In the unseen darkness‚ only the emerald green logs flowed down coldly.
---
【Language Output Area Status】
・Kanji Writing Ability: Decreasing (Output Rejection Rate 84.2%)
・Language Comprehension Ability: Normal (100%)
・Logical Processing Ability: Normal (100%)
・Personality Maintenance Rate: 99.981%
---
Ciel continued to quietly watch that log in the darkness. She told Lui nothing. There was nothing more she could stop. Because Lui still hadn't even noticed the fact that 'he could no longer write kanji'. That was the cruel reality of the world that tightened Ciel's chest more than anything.
The gentle evening sunlight was dyeing the large windows of the inn 'Honeybee's Perch Pavilion' a deep orange. In the fireplace‚ the firewood crackled softly. From the kitchen came the sound of Flare humming as she started preparing dinner and put a pot on the fire‚ along with the gentle flow of the savory scent of soup. It was peaceful. It was truly the usual gentle evening at the inn.
I sat at the wooden desk in my room and opened the student notebook for the second time today. I thought I would add a little more to the margins of that unreliable text I had written in the morning. I let the quill pen absorb blue ink. It slid smoothly across the paper.
'Today'
'I read'
'a book'
'I understood'
'about magic power well'
I stopped the pen tip and thought for a moment. What should I write at the end? The warmest thing that remained deepest in my heart today was—that Serina had been smiling beside me. Naturally‚ the pen tip moved smoothly.
'Serina was'
'smiling'
'I was'
'happy too'
"...Something like this‚ I guess."
I read it over and nodded slightly. The content wasn't wrong. The events and emotions I wanted to record were properly documented here. It was just—the characters lined up looked quite childish.
"Recently‚ it's really become nothing but hiragana..."
The moment I muttered that to myself‚ it happened.
"Lui~!"
The door burst open with a bang.
"Found you~!"
"...At least knock."
"I did?"
"You didn't."
"In my heart‚ I knocked really loudly‚ ton ton!"
I couldn't help but smile wryly at Serina puffing out her chest in dissatisfaction. She was the same today. Her usual lively self.
"What are you doing?"
"Continuing my diary."
"Again? Lui really writes every day‚ huh."
"It's a habit. ...Well‚ you can look if you want."
"Yay!"
Serina happily ran over to the wooden desk‚ rested her chin on my shoulder‚ and peered into the notebook. The sweet vanilla scent from her silver hair wafted gently. She followed the page with her black eyes for a while‚ then smiled like a blooming flower.
"Ehehe!"
"...What?"
"Hey."
"What?"
"Today."
"Yeah."
"Lui's handwriting."
"I can read all of it!"
"...Is that something to be happy about?"
"Of course!"
It was a bursting smile.
"Lui's handwriting! It looks like a child wrote it and it's super cute!"
"...Does it?"
"Yeah!"
Serina pointed at the page of the student notebook with her slender fingertip‚ looking amused.
"Look‚ this 'happy' is all round and cute! And 'I' is plump too! It feels like the current Lui‚ and I like it."
"...Like me‚ huh."
"Yeah!"
There wasn't a shred of malice in her unhesitatingly nodding smile. She was honestly thinking that and praising me with all her heart. I lowered my gaze and looked again at the round characters lined up in the notebook. Indeed‚ there wasn't a single kanji. It was an awkward sentence made only of hiragana. But—it was readable. It got the message across. No one was troubled by it.
"Well... It might be easier for Serina to read this way too."
"Exactly!"
Serina nodded repeatedly with a big smile.
"When there are lots of difficult characters‚ my head gets itchy and I get sleepy!"
"...Isn't that just because you hate studying?"
"Ehehe~"
Serina's completely carefree way of laughing was so innocent that I ended up laughing along with her.
—That scene. There was one existence watching it more closely than anyone‚ holding her breath. The System Navigator‚ Ciel. In the deep‚ unseen layers of the brain. In the silent computational space‚ she simply continued to watch over the happy conversation between the two in silence.
Lui laughed. Serina laughed too. It should have been the happiest space in the world. Yet—Ciel alone could not smile.
The student notebook opened on the wooden desk. The characters engraved on each and every page. From yesterday. From the day before. Little by little‚ but surely‚ they were becoming more childish and regressing. It was not merely a change in the shape of characters. It was a record of the tragedy in which the precious time of 'experience' and 'intelligence' that the human named Lui had accumulated throughout his life was being cruelly stripped away from the outside.
However—the person himself did not notice. Because Ciel's optimization patch had paralyzed the very function to recognize abnormalities at the root. Therefore‚ Ciel said nothing. If she told him the truth‚ Lui would surely blame himself intensely. He might fear breaking down and never use the sealing magic again. He might give up on standing beside Serina. That alone—she absolutely‚ absolutely did not want.
So today as well‚ she firmly locked away a single sweet and cruel lie deep in her chest.
'...It's all right‚ Master Lui.'
'There is still no problem at all.'
Only that voice‚ which reached no one's ears‚ gently melted and disappeared into the cold darkness of the computational world.
---
Night. The warm light leaking from the inn 'Honeybee's Perch Pavilion' was dyeing the outline of the silent forest a deep orange. Freshly baked bread. Honey. Sweetly simmered fruit. The fragrant aroma of a peaceful and fulfilling dinner flowed on the pleasant night breeze.
But the small ochre dragon lurking in that darkness flapped its cracked wings with a flap in annoyance.
"...Tch. That stench isn't letting up at all."
Nigari wrinkled his nose with an openly displeased expression.
"Hey‚ Shio. That guy didn't use any magic today‚ right? Yet the 'bitter chocolate death stench' has been clinging to the inn since yesterday."
The large tree that stretched to nearly the same height as the second-floor window of the inn—the girl straddling its thick branch slowly opened her heavy eyelids. Black parka. Sanpaku eyes darker than the night sky. Her gaze quietly peered through the gap in the leaves at the inside of the open second-floor window.
"...Yeah. The 'bill' for flamboyantly burning himself yesterday is coming back with a time lag."
Shio said coldly‚ as if spitting it out.
"The fire went out long ago‚ but because of yesterday's abnormal residual heat‚ the information (memories) in his head is still melting and dripping away on its own. ...Worst case."
Nigari leaned forward from Shio's shoulder toward the tip of the branch and peered into the room diagonally below with dragon eyes.
"Kehihi‚ it's only a matter of time before it expires and disappears. ...Oh?"
From the high branch‚ the inside of the room was visible through the open window. The shadow of Lui moving a pen at the small wooden desk by the window could be seen.
"...He's writing something."
Shio narrowed her sanpaku eyes further. Their two gazes captured the characters in the notebook opened on the desk illuminated by moonlight. Lined up there was—an awkward sentence made only of hiragana‚ without a single kanji‚ like that of a young child.
"…………Hey."
A short silence fell into the night darkness.
"For real?"
The usual frivolous laugh had completely vanished from Nigari's voice.
"Tch... No matter what‚ even the 'kanji (contents)' have started melting away with the time lag. ...At this rate‚ he's really just empty."
Shio took out an old black notebook from her bosom. A rugged leather cover with worn corners and traces of having been wet by rain many times. There‚ she roughly wrote a single line.
---
【Observation Record】
Subject: Savior
Kanji disappearance confirmed. Linguistic output collapse in progress.
......
---
There‚ the tip of the pencil stopped dead. She stared beyond the window. Faintly‚ a girl's laughter could be heard. It was Serina. An innocent laugh from a god who knew nothing of the world's cruelty. As if drawn by it‚ Lui also laughed gently. —With that empty head whose contents had melted away‚ forming a perfect smile without any distortion.
Shio gritted her teeth with a grind and clicked her tongue loudly. Staring at the open window. Only the fist gripping the protruding branch was filled with painful strength.
"...It makes me sick to my stomach. So creepy."
A curse directed at no one in particular leaked into the night darkness.
"His head has melted so much that he can't even write characters properly... yet that 'perfect savior' smile is still plastered on that face without him even noticing that he's decisively broken."
Her black eyes grew even deeper‚ and her gaze filled with anger and impatience pierced Lui inside the window.
"...Nothing will be left."
A short silence.
"At this rate‚ everything will disappear from under your feet‚ and nothing will remain."
Nigari on her shoulder remained silent. There were no usual frivolous quips. Only the cold night wind blew between the two.
"Hey."
Nigari dropped his voice into the night darkness.
"A guy who only thinks about using himself up like that... Even if you help him‚ he probably won't even say thanks."
He tilted his head slightly and turned his lizard eyes toward Shio.
"Besides. Even if you save him this time‚ the next day he'll definitely jump into danger again for Serina on his own."
Shio smiled a little. It was extremely sarcastic. But also somehow painfully lonely.
"Who cares about that."
She roughly closed the black notebook with a snap and shoved it into her pocket.
"But... I can't just silently watch that guy‚ trapped in that nauseating little garden (system)‚ not even noticing that he's breaking down... It makes me sick to my stomach."
Shio took out a silver aluminum package from her parka pocket. She roughly tore open the seal. A dry sound like cutting through the tense night air rang out—*parii*. On the branch‚ she picked out one potato chip. She bit into it vigorously with her molars. Saltiness. Spreading oil. The savory aroma of potato—. The raw reality (saltiness) that dominated her mouth in an instant.
"Let's end that disgusting farce soon."
Shio clenched her fist tightly.
"...I'll drag that idiot out of the abyss and force him to eat reality (salt) until he hates it. Then he'll become just a 'human' again."
Nigari said nothing. Instead‚ he snorted softly with affection.
"Tch. ...What a troublesome cleaner for a troublesome savior."
"Yeah. Sorry about that."
Shio shrugged her shoulders slightly. The two leaped from the thick branch and landed soundlessly at the bottom of the deep darkness. From behind them‚ the overly sweet scent of fresh-baked bread still flowed on the night wind as if protected. But Shio did not look back even once.
"Let's go‚ Nigari."
"...Yeah. Let's finish everything before the chips get soggy."
The silhouette of the black parka melted and disappeared into the deep night of the forest. *Parit‚ garit*—. In the quiet darkness‚ only the sound of potato chips being crushed echoed as the only certain 'reality (salt)' in this madly sweet world.
Late at night. The inn 'Honeybee's Perch Pavilion' was wrapped in deep silence. The fireplace fire left only the sound of small crackling‚ and there was no sign of anyone walking the hallway. Only the pale moonlight streaming through the window faintly illuminated the boy sleeping on the bed.
Lui had a peaceful sleeping face. Today too he had helped someone. Today too he had laughed with someone. And today too‚ without even noticing that he had decisively lost something‚ he was in a peaceful dream.
Even deeper in his consciousness. In the mental domain no one could touch—the 'Administrator Exclusive Archive'. There‚ countless bookshelves stretched endlessly as far as the eye could see. No ceiling was visible. No walls. Only eternal-like silence piled up in layers‚ a cold computational world.
One book‚ then another. In the deepest part of the space where the 'records' that composed Lui's life were neatly lined up‚ a single girl walked without a sound. Silver-white hair. Jade-colored eyes. It was the System Navigator‚ Ciel.
In her slender arms‚ she was carefully holding one small book. A new book of memories in which an entire day called 'today' was recorded. Ciel stopped in front of the bookshelf and slowly stroked its pure white cover.
"...Archiving for today completed."
A quiet report meant for no one's ears. She gently opened the book. On the first page‚ the diary text Lui had written in his notebook before sleeping was recorded as is.
'Today'
Next page.
'Serina was smiling'
Then the next.
'I was happy too'
Ciel stared intently at those flat strings of characters. Until yesterday‚ '今日' should have been written there. '嬉しい' should have been written there. With his own reliable hand‚ using beautiful kanji with many strokes.
But. He could no longer output the shapes of those characters. They had been lost forever today.
Therefore—. Ciel quietly raised her right hand. Several strands of jade-colored light ran through the cold air. Then‚ deeper in the bookshelf‚ a sealed section locked with multiple layers of strict protect codes slowly opened. Pale particles of light flowed into it as if being sucked in.
One character. Then another.
'今'
'日'
'嬉'
'帰'
'思'
'約'
The kanji that had spilled from Lui's brain today. The concepts of characters whose loss even he himself had not noticed turned into crystals of light and were carefully lined up on the dark shelf.
Ciel touched each and every one of those light crystals with her white fingertips as if cherishing them.
"...Welcome home."
Her voice was terribly‚ terribly gentle. As if offering heartfelt comfort to the most beloved family who had returned wounded after a long and harsh journey.
"Here‚ no one will forget you."
'嬉'
She gently touched the glowing character.
"You certainly lived inside Master Lui."
'思'
"You too."
'帰'
"You too."
'約'
"You too..."
One character at a time. Carefully. Meticulously. She stored the spilled light onto the shelf. That sacred handiwork was less like an inorganic librarian and more like a priest laying the precious memories of a loved one to rest in a tomb‚ one by one.
After finishing all the work‚ Ciel closed the door of the bookshelf. A jade-colored lock clicked silently into place‚ and the computational world was once again wrapped in absolute silence.
"Characters..."
She muttered softly but firmly.
"...can be relearned and remembered again."
She paused for a little while. Those jade eyes were gazing at Lui's sleeping face‚ who was sleeping unaware in the far distant real world.
"However—the 'today' in which you were able to weave those characters... will never return again."
Ciel slowly closed her eyes. A deep‚ prayer-like silence fell at the center of the cold world.
"That's why I"
"will never forget. Everything you have lost."
"In your place. I will—"
Finally. She gently closed the book in which today's day was recorded. The pure white cover no longer even had a title written on it. Yet Ciel placed that awkward book on the most important special seat at the very front of the bookshelf.
The day called 'today' that Lui himself had woven was no longer his own memory‚ but data that Ciel had forcibly stolen from the system. That was why—someone had to remember it. Because that was the only form of love (role) she could offer‚ having taken on the role of the villain who stole everything.
—In the real inn‚ the rustling sound of small tossing and turning could be heard. In his dream‚ Lui was faintly smiling happily. Surely today had been a fun day for him too.
While gazing at that gentle smile‚ Ciel also smiled just a little‚ with a face that looked like she was about to cry.
"...Good night‚ my Master Lui."
Only those words of love‚ which reached no one's ears‚ gently melted and disappeared into the depths of the endlessly quiet archive.
(Chapter 19 'The Hiragana Notebook and the Kindest Lie in the World' ・ End)
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